Tag Archives: SaturdayMorningCinema

Hail To The Dhampir!

Good morning fellow Painkillers, and welcome to another addition of Saturday Morning Cinema. Today I’m going to give you a classic movie from 1985. It’s about vampires, and not the bullshit vampires that we have today. These guys don’t sparkle in the sunlight, and humans are actually scared of them, and don’t find them sexy, and are not trying to fuck them. So without further delay let’s get into Vampire Hunter D.

So for those of you that have never heard of this before, I’m going to give you a brief summary of the franchise. The series is set in a far off future that has dealt with nuclear war in its past. It has elements of many genres such as fantasy, si-fi, western, and horror. The main character known as D. He is a dhampir, the son of a full blooded vampire father, and a full blooded human mother. Because of this, he doesn’t suffer from the normal weaknesses that hurt vampires, but he does suffer from sun sickness that hits him once every few years. D is also the host of a symbiote that goes by Left hand, since he resides in D’s left hand. He plays the wise cracking sidekick role, but Left Hand has some very useful powers that helps out D, even though Driving is very powerful himself. The two of them go around and hunt down vampires and other dark beings that threaten the human world. Now on with the movie.

Count Magnus Lee, a 10,000 year old, long lost Noble vampire is in search of a a bride. His choice, Doris Lang, the daughter of a well known deceased werewolf hunter. He attacks her, but she gets away, and happens to runs into D. After explaining what is going on, Doris hires D to protect her from Magnus. A little while later, they come across Doris’s younger brother Dan, and a man named Greco Roman. He is the mayor’s son. He knows what has happened to Doris, and offers to help to protect her as well. In exchange, he wants Doris for himself. Wow! OK, either Doris is rich, the hottest girl in the land, or they are in a small town, and she is the only girl that is single and of age. Anyway, does Doris accept Greco’s offer? Can D and Left Hand protect Doris from Magnus? Does Doris become Magnus’s bride? To get these answers and more, you have to see the movie for yourself, cause I’m not going to give you those answers.

Even though this is an older series, this movie is pretty good. The animation style fits it’s time period, so it doesn’t stand out in that way, it stands out due to its story. I personally saw this movie without ever knowing anything about the Vampire Hunter D series, and not only did I understand it, I definitely wanted more. Luckily there is another movie, but that’s one for another time. If you haven’t seen this, or it has been a while since you seen it last, go find it, or dust off that DVD you have and check it out. Until next time Painkillers.


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Ninjas Everywhere!!!

Good morning Painkillers new and old, and welcome to another addition of Saturday Morning Cinema. Today’s feature will contain something that most of us always wanted to be, ninjas! Woo-hoo! Feudal Japan, secrets, lies, and ninjas, what more can you ask for. So let’s get into it. Stay in your pajamas, grab the biggest bowl in the house, pour yourself some cereal, and plop down on the couch, and watch Ninja Scrolls.

The movie opens up with the introduction of the main character Jubei Kibagami. He is a mercenary that just completed a job, that other ninjas were originally hired to do, and Jubei did it for less money. Those ninjas confront him, and Jubei quickly handles them with ease.

After the deaths of a nearby village, a ninja team is set out to investigate, unfortunately the team is completely wiped out, except for one named Kagero. She is captured by Tessai, a member of the Eight Devils, a ninja team that has supernatural powers. As Tessai begins to molest Kagero, Jubei is nearby to break it up, and he kills Tessai.

Kagero returns home to report what happens, and is told to find out more information about Tessai, and the rest of his ninja team. Jubei runs into a government spy named Dakuna. He has heard about Jubei killing one of the Eight Devils, and wants his help to kill off the other seven. When Jubei refuses, Dakuna stabs him with a poisonous shuriken, and tells him that he will get the antidote once the remaining Devils are dead.

Will Jubei kill the other devils in time to receive the antidote? Will Kagero get revenge for her fallen comrades? Does Dakuna actually have an antidote for that poison, and if so will he actually give it to Jubei? Will all three of them survive? There is only one way to find out.

This movie came out in Japan in 1993, and the English version came out in 1995. The drawing style is really good, and is what you were used to during that period of time. The story is great, and easy to follow, and Jubei character is loosely based on a legendary samurai warrior. Normally this is where I would tell you what site or streaming service you could find this at, so you guys can watch it for yourself. Unfortunately, since I have this on DVD, I honestly forgot to look for it. Sorry, if I happen to see it somewhere, I will post where I found it at in the comment section. Until next time Painkillers.


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