Tag Archives: Mega Drive/Genesis

Beastmode Activate!

Good morning my loyal Painkillers, and welcome to another addition of Grab A Buddy Monday. Some of you may have noticed the title and the picture, and if you were at the HBCL from the beginning, you may be asking yourself, didn’t The Chairman do this game already? The answer is, yes he did. He did it for his games that scared the shit out of him series, or whatever he called it. (By the way, the article is called Remolded Varmint, check it out in his archive, it’s a good read.) So hears the deal, I’m looking at it as a two player game, so this is going to be much different than his. There might be some similarities, due to the fact that I have to describe the story, since I don’t know who has played this game, or who has read The Chairman’s article. Anyway, let’s get down to it, you know what time it is. Grab your buddy, hook up your Genesis/Master System, and it’s time to play some Altered Beast.

So the story goes as follows, the Demon God from the Underworld name Neff has kidnapped Zeus’s daughter Athena. (How powerful is Neff to be able to kidnap her?) In order to save his daughter, Zeus resurrects a fallen Greek warrior to go and rescue Athena. That’s where you come in, and in this case your buddy, cause Zeus will resurrect two warriors.

In this side scrolling beat’em up, you and your buddy fight your way through five levels of undead creatures. Along the way, you have to collect these powers orbs, that makes you bigger and stronger. Once you collect three orbs, you transform into a wear beast. Level one is a wearwolf, two is a weardragon, three is a wearbear, four is a weartiger, and the final stage you turn into a golden werewolf. Once you transform, you are now able to take on the stage boss. Careful, because if you take too long collecting the orbs, and clearing the stage, the boss will show up regardless.

This game is alot of fun. It can be a bit difficult, since it did come from an arcade game that was designed to take all your money. Once you get the understanding of the game, you can beat it in about 10 minutes or so. It made be short, but it is worth sitting down playing this game. Until next time Painkillers.

 

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Skating, Hitching and Bitching

Good morning Painkillers, and welcome to another addition of Grab A Buddy Monday. Today we are going to talk about a game that didn’t get high ratings when it first came out, but it’s a lot of fun to play. It is very similar to Road Rash 2, a game that I told you about before, so if you enjoyed that game, then you should enjoy this game as well. So now, you guys know what to do. Grab your buddy, hook up your Genesis/Master System, and it’s time to play Skitchin.

Skitchin came out in 1994, and was made by Electronic Arts. What!? EA making a game that people enjoyed, what the hell happened? Oooo, oh Chairman. Anyway, as I said earlier this game came out to negative press. Mostly because they said that if you played one race, you played the entire game. But can’t you say that about most racing games that come out, including the Road Rash games that came out during this time? Well, I’ll discuss the game and let you guys decide.

In this game you play as a rollerblader that is trying to win races across the US and Canada. You race against seven other racers, in a pretty much anything goes style race. Races happen on busy streets in whatever city they are in. There are cars, trucks, motorcycles, and other vehicles that have no issues with running you down, to get to their destination. Luckily for you and the other racers, you can use those vehicles to help you get to the finish line faster. You can either hold onto the back of a car, and just ride all the way to the end of the race, or you can grab one car, and either slingshot yourself forward to grab another car, or just move forward and use that speed to help win the race.

Combat is also a big part of this game. You can beat up other racers, but if you are not careful, you will be the one getting beat down and ending up in last place. Most combat is mostly done unarmed, either by getting near a racer and throwing some punches and kicks, or while hanging on the back of a vehicle trying to knock each other off. If you are lucky enough, you can bend down and grab a weapon off the ground, as you skate over it. Weapons are normally chains, bats, and nunchucks. They cause more damage and you need less attempts to beat up the other weapons. Besides dealing with cars, weapons, other racers, and shit all over the road, there are also ramps that you can try to pull off stunts. The harder the stunts, the more money you can make off of them, that is if you land them.

This game is very fun, and it brings it to a different level when you are playing with a buddy on split screen. I don’t know why it got such bad reviews. Maybe it had something to do with the possibility of people going out and trying to hitch on the back of a moving car, while on blades, bikes, or skateboards. So giving the game bad reviews, to prevent high sell volume, so that young people wouldn’t be out trying this in real life, sounds plausible, since people have tried this in the past, and were injured and some killed doing it, but I couldn be completely wrong. Maybe only a few people liked this game, including myself, and we just can’t see the flaws. Oh well! Until next time Painkillers.

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Road Rage At Its Finest

Good morning Leaguers and my loyal Painkillers, and welcome to another addition of Grab a Buddy Monday. For today’s game, it’s time to let out some of that pent up anger that you and your buddy have for one another. Did you ever want to pull out a club or a chain, and use it to knock your friend off a speeding motorcycle? If so, then I have the perfect game for you. So it’s time to grab your buddy, hook up your Genesis, and it’s time to play Road Rash 2.

Some of you might be asking, “Why the hell is Captain Pain doing the second game in the series? He normally does the first game!”, and you are all correct for asking that. Yes I would normally do the first game, but this game has the better two player mode, and that is important to me when reviewing games for GABM, especially since that’s kind of the gimmick. In the original Road Rash, the two player mode was some turn base nonsense, that you would find in something like Super Mario Bros. That doesn’t seem suitable for a racing game, where the players want to race against each other. In the sequel, it’s split screen, and you’re allowed to play at the same time. Now back to Road Rash 2

The game came out for the Sega Genesis in 1992, and was developed by Electronic Arts, you know, back in the day when they made good games that weren’t trying to nickle and dime you with microtranactions and loot boxes. Then again, if that stuff was around back then, I wouldn’t be surprised if people would spend $1.99 a pop to try to get a pair of nunchucks or some other cool weapon. Anyway, unlike in the first game where you only race in California, this game allows you to race in Alaska, Hawaii, Tennessee, Arizona, and Vermont. There are also 15 different motorcycles to choose from.

In split screen mode, the mode that we care about, you and your buddy can race against other AI racers, or just go one on one against each other. Either way, besides battling your buddy and possibly other racers, you still have deal with traffic, and the police. Yeah just like real life, the police have an issue with speeding, and beating people with bats and other weapons to try to knock each other off bikes going 100+ mph. So yeah this game is loads of fun. Most of the end race animations are funny as hell, and try not to get knocked off your bike, it might cost you. I’d you like this game, then you should definitely check out the third one.

 

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Montana, Joe Montana

What if I told you that there was a time that you could play a NFL licensed game, and it had nothing to do with John Madden. That the A, B, and C buttons were all you needed to call and run plays. That the two games that came out before they got the licence, had the greatest quarter back of his generation, possibly the greatest of all time, front and center of the game, and they were named after him. ESPN and Captain Pain Products presents, 30 for……. OK, that’s enough before I and the HBCL gets sued. We are a bunch of empty bags anyway. Since it’s Monday, my Painkillers know that it’s time to grab a buddy, and since I said the buttons earlier, you should have hooked up your Genesis by now. It’s time to play NFL Sports Talk Football 93 featuring Joe Montana.

As I said earlier, this is the third game in the Joe Montana series of games, but the first to use the NFL license. This allowed them to actually use the names of the 28 teams at the time and use the phrase “Super Bowl “,when in the past they only used the city, and they played in the Sega Bowl. The game also has commentary. It uses some robotic voice, cause it sure as hell doesn’t sound like the late Lon Simmons. The playbook is also a good size, so there are many plays to choose from.

The game is fun to play. You and your buddy will have a good time playing this classic game, and trying to remember what teams were good, and who was on each team during that time. You can also see the evolution of football games, and see some of the building blocks for a game like Madden. Also you playing this game, you have a much better chance of getting and winning the Super bowl, than winning your fantasy football league.

 

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Toad Power!

Are you ready? No, I said are you ready? Nope, because it’s Monday once again. Just like no one is ready for Asuka, no one is ready for Mondays. Fear not my little Painkillers, the Captain is here to make your Monday, a bit more bearable. So like always, it time to grab a buddy, and you choose if you want to hook up either your NES or your Sega Genesis (I’ll be talking about the Genesis copy, since that’s the one I played, and they are both the same.), and it’s time to play some Battletoads!

Those of you that are familiar with this game, already know that I could have easily wrote this for our No Save November series going on this month, due to the extreme difficulty of this game, and of course not using a save or password feature. Crazy part is, the Sega Genesis version of the game, is said to be less difficult than the NES version, and I still found it hard as hell. Depending on your skill level as a gamer, these 13 levels can either be a cake walk, or your never ending nightmare.

The plot of the game, maybe the only simple thing in this game. Pimple (one of the battletoads) and Princess Angelica have been kidnapped by the Dark Queen, and it’s up to Rash, and Zitz to rescue them. You play as either Rash or Zitz, depending on if you are player one or player two, and play through 13 of the craziest levels in gaming. It’s not only the fact that most of the levels are crazy hard, it doesn’t help matters that you are able to accidentally hit your ally (or on purpose if you are a real jerk). Also, say if one of you happens to die, and needs to continue, well now you are both screwed, because you now both have to restart the entire level over. Yeah, have fun with that.

Overall, Battletoads is a fun and good game. It will not only put all of your gaming skills to the test, it will also put your friendship to the test as well. Will you and your friend survive the Battletoad onslaught, or will your friendship be ruined over this, like other friendships have been over that classic board game did. You know which one I’m talking about. The one with the old guy with the top hat and the monocle.

 

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Time to Test Your Jitsu

So here we are again! It’s Friday, you just got home from work, and you are trying to avoid the few friends that you have, because they still want to go out and eat and drink pumpkin flavored bullshit. So what now? Do you want to play a game that is hard as hell, and you wished had a save feature? You do? Great, go grab your Genesis, and prepare yourself for the fuckery know as Revenge of the Shinobi. Thanks, a lot No Save November!
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The Barbarian, The Amazon and The Dwarf

Hello November! Here at the HBCL, we love our themes. So this month’s theme is No Saves November ( I see what you did there Chairman!). So, any post that falls under this theme, will be about games that don’t have a normal save function, or someone broked, up the save options. Therefore, for my first post for No Save November, I figured that I would start off with something that many people would know. Now, let’s dive head first into Golden Axe for the Sega Genesis.
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